w/c 07/02/09

Where on earth do Channel 4 find the wierdos to appear in their programmes?

In A Very British Storm Chaser (Thursday, 9pm), we were introduced to a rather geeky, Stewart Robinson, an IT consultant whose hobby was dashing off all over the world to watch hurricanes and typhoons.
But at first one wonders what is more fascinating: his storm footage or his teeth vaguely reminiscent of graveyard tombs.
His long-suffering fiance Alison was used to him jetting off at a drop of a hat as soon as his high-tech equipment in his office told him there was a storm brewing; even though his shenanigans brewed many a storm right there in his own home.

Stewart's fascination started when he watched the film Twister, which is all about tornadoes, and his ultimate goal is to be in the eye of the storm. Thank God he didn't see Striptease instead.

He shows us his survival kit - tins of beans, goggles and glow sticks; you know, what you'd expect. (?)

Now what would be fascinating would be to see Stewart eating the beans in 100 mile and hour winds.

Especially with those nashers.

The height of this tale, if there is such a thing, is when Stewart and his mate go to New Orleans to chase the hurricane. It's total gridlock as everyone is trying to get out and these two have their side of the freeway to themselves trying to get in. They whoop with delight as police let them into a deserted car park where they can watch the storm in safety, only to find that the storm has moved a few miles and is now nowhere near them.

Hey-ho.

However, all is not lost as they speed to the storm and battle through the fierce winds and rain to finally get into the eye of the storm. And what was there?

Erm, nowt really. Just a few puddles.

Stewart spots another storm building a couple of days later and phones home to ask if he can stay on in the US. Alison has reached her limit by now however and puts her foot down. She's going away and it means she won't see him for a couple of weeks. (Personally, I'd be cracking the Champers, but back to the story), "You're pointing an emotional gun to my head!" He cries and stomps around the room a bit determined to stay.

Stewart's on the next flight home.

There's nothing more scary than a storm of a woman's scorn. And by the way, is this programme really a Victoria Wood sketch?

We leave the whirlwind of fun and mirth that is Stewart and Alison in their kitchen having just enjoyed a roast dinner.
"Do you want another roast potato?" She enquires. "No, I'm quite full. I want to ensure I've left room for crumble."

And of course, by now, we've all lost the will to live...