The bizarre world of Come Dine With Me, Sunday 8pm CH4

Good God.

Just when you think it's safe to turn over to Channel 4 for a little light relief, we are hit with four very odd Brummies trying to cook a three-course dinner in order to win a cash prize of a grand.

Quite simply, four complete strangers host a dinner party in turn for the other diners to vote on in secret. Sounds like a programme for toffs? Far from it...

First of all the viewers and the other guests were introduced to Fareeda, a bubbly Muslim lady who doesn't allow alcohol in her house much to the shock of her guests Natalie, Mike and Lee. They do instead don traditional Indian dress and eat on the floor.
Hmmm.
But the curry went down well, even if the guests had to drink their bottles of wine in the taxi home. But for a couple of the guests, it doesn't look as if it would be an alien concept.

The next evening, it was all round to half-Spanish Natalie's pad. Well her mum and dad's mansion to be precise, for gazpacho, paella and creme brulee. It's here that the knives started to come out - and that's nowt to do with carving.

Aussie Mike didn't like salesman Lee because he's a bit full of himself which is a little rich considering Mike has strutted about like a constipated bulldog for the last two evenings.

Lee, with an eye for a sale, gives Natalie £40 for her very large sangria bowl complete with sangria. The next night, as it is his turn to cook, Lee hilariously puts two goldfish in it instead. And it went down like a mixed grill at a vegetarian luncheon.

Lee, convinced from the start that he was the winner, runs out of time when preparing his food. Consequently, his guests eat two hours later than planned. His burnt creme brulee got thrown out of the window and he gave his guests a bunch of asparagus and packet sauce to take home. His score out of a possible 40? Er, seven.

The last evening was hosted by Aussie Mike who was cockily assured of victory. He made all his guests wear loud shirts for some strange reason. However, his beef was tough and his veggies burned but his Prince Regent cake was a hit.

Pity the hit wasn't between a palm and his smug fat face.

The winner of the coveted prize is Natalie. But the biggest prize must go to Dave Lamb, narrator of the show who promptly took the proverbial throughout the show.